Aaron and the Chipmunks

DSI Witness News is dedicated to bringing you hard hitting, fast breaking news.  Here with a summary of the the DSI Witness News philosophy (in song) are our fastest reporters, Aaron and the Chipmunks!  Molly Buckley, Bryan Barnes, Kit FitzSimons, Aaron Keck.

2 Comments

  1. DSI Witness News says:

    MOLLY: It’s another edition of DSI Witness News. I’m Molly Buckley. The holiday season is a time for fun and laughter, but as 2009 comes to a close, we here at DSI Witness News want to reaffirm our dedication to bringing you the most hard-hitting, fast-breaking news in the Triangle. We know when you want fast-breaking news, you want it FAST… so, here are our three hardest-hitting… or at least our three fastest reporters, Aaron and the Chipmunks. All right you Chipmunks! Ready to recite the DSI Witness News Mission Statement?

    KIT: I’ll say we are!

    BRYAN: Yeah!

    AARON: Let’s sing it now!

    MOLLY: Okay, Bryan Barnes?

    BRYAN: Okay!

    MOLLY: Okay, Kit Fitz – Simon?

    KIT: It’s FitzSimons.!

    MOLLY: Okay, Aaron? Aaron? AARON!

    AARON: OKAY!!!

    BRYAN, KIT, AARON:
    Christmas, Christmas time is near
    Time for Foy to disappear
    We’ll mock the news, we’ll do it live
    8:20 and 5:55
    We’ll twist headlines, we’ll spit the troof

    AARON: We’ll still make fun of Kevin WOOlff!

    BRYAN, KIT, AARON:
    We’ll trash talk those who’re dumb and mean
    And Homegrown Halloween.

    MOLLY: Okay fellas get ready. Very good Bryan Barnes.

    BRYAN: Awwww.

    MOLLY: That was very good, Kit Fitz – Simon.

    KIT: I work with you daily; it’s pronounced FitzSIMONS

    MOLLY: Ah, Aaron, you forced that rhyme a little, watch it. Aaron? Aaron? AARON!

    AARON: OKAY.

    BRYAN, KIT, AARON:
    We’ll mock the news, all off the cuff

    AARON: And we’ll get sued by Kevin Wuhlff

    BRYAN, KIT, AARON:
    He’s almost, like, half of the show
    The other’s Pittsboro.

    MOLLY: Very good, boys

    AARON: Lets sing it again!

    KIT: Yeah, this time with Ron doing contrabass!

    MOLLY: No, That’s enough, lets not overdo it

    BRYAN: What do you mean overdo it?

    AARON: Since when does DSI Witness News NOT overdo it?

    MOLLY: Now wait a minute, boys

    BRYAN: Why CAN’T we sing it again?

    BRYAN, KIT, AARON: [overlapping chipmunk chatter]

    MOLLY: Aaron, cut that out..Bryan Barnes, just a minute. Kit Fitz – Simon will you cut that out?

    KIT: It’s FitzSimons!

    MOLLY: Boys…!

  2. Bryan saying “Why Can’t we sing it again?” makes me laugh every time